By now, I can confidently say that the term “scheme” has infiltrated the minds of all Deerfield community members, faculty and staff included. What might be more up to the imagination of the adults is how exactly the pairings this word refers to come to be. A typical Deerfield relationship, unlike others at peer schools and day schools, takes a course of action that is quite distinct. But how does such a thing manifest itself on campus?
To begin: Snapchat — a social media app that has transformed the means of communication for teenagers everywhere. A platform for texting with selfies, more or less, has become the key tool to getting to know someone else. A simple quick add and selfie exchange back and forth has proved itself sufficient in making the first move.
Secondly, a walk. You see, at a day school, adolescents have the opportunity to drive to places like restaurants, movie theaters, arcades, bowling alleys, and other social spots together, but not at Deerfield Academy. Typically a walk around the Small Loop is an appropriate way to approach someone who you may not have too many “mutuals” with. This strategy happens to be a technique born during the the COVID-19 Pandemic, during the 2020-2021 school year, yet it has evidently stuck around (for its high success rate, of course).
Next up: Studying. Studying together is the perfect way to spend quality time alone while still getting to learn more about each other. It’s not too formal; if for whatever reason the conversation dies down and things begin to tense up, you have your computer and homework to attend to! It is practical and a way to get the ball rolling with your special someone. You are finally sitting together, alone, but without the fear of running out of things to talk about. The best part is, if you’re really not feeling it, then maybe your math homework is suddenly too overwhelming and you need to get back to your room. Or maybe you forgot your calculator and can’t work anymore. Or maybe… you’ll get lucky, and it’s nearing time to check-in — whichever happens first.
Weekends change things. On weeknights it’s understood that you have a busy life and heavy workload ahead of you. On Friday and Saturday, those excuses are no longer viable. If you are lucky, you and your soon to be significant other can casually hang out in the Greer with plenty of your friends, however, this is not always the case. Without anyone around you to break the ice, going to sit at the Greer alone together could be daunting. By bringing a friend or two, if need be, your friend can suddenly receive the most overwhelming news that leads to you both needing to get back to your dorm immediately. On the bright side, if things go well, your friend can suddenly receive the most overwhelming news that leads to just them going back to the dorm immediately. It’s a win-win.
The final stage: Parietals. At this point, you’ve both recognized that there’s a spark. It’s time to solidify your interest in one another by hanging out alone, fully alone. Whether your plan is to watch a movie or a new show, play a card game, or just to see where the conversation takes you, it can be nerve wracking. Don’t fear! It’s butterflies. This is just the beginning of your incredible journey together. You’ll embark on expeditions to the Greer, the library, the Koch cafe, each other’s dorm rooms, sporting events, and other wild new places! So really, don’t put too much pressure on any of it. Besides, if none of this sounds enticing, simply don’t bother adding them back on Snapchat.